'They were trying to peel eggs with a vegetable peeler': 40+ People who were stumped by common household items

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  • 01
    'He called me in a panic because he'd locked himself inside a house'
  • 02
    What is the most everyday object you've seen someone hilariously fail trying to use?
  • 03
    Photeus5 My 90 year old grandmother was at some other 70 year olds cooking for a church because they were trying to peel eggs with a vegetable peeler.
  • 04
    Sergeant_Sriracha Witnessed multiple people ask why north just moved on a compass after they have rotated 90°.
  • 05
    JU Zilphar When a friend and I were in Rome, we were in a restroom and we couldn't figure out how to turn on the sink. We looked for handles. We checked if it had a motion sensor. Nothing. Just when we were about to give up hope, I saw a small rubber dome under each sink. I decided to step on it and voila, water. T The best part was that there was a man waiting to wash his hands who probably thought we were the two biggest idiots in the world.
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    gardenmarauding I worked with someone who genuinely did not know how to use paperclips. He was really embarrassed when someone called him out on not knowing and showed him how.
  • 07
    [deleted] After years of using the families windows98 i 'upgraded' the family with my old but gold computer. My mother rang me 3 times in the next 2 weeks because she couldnt find the power button, why? Because the old computer had a big red power button and the new computer was 'broken' because it had a big blue power button IN THE EXACT SAME SPOT.
  • 08
    [deleted] I once watched someone try to light the base of a firecracker. As in the end without the fuse To be honest its a bit of a miracle that the guy that did it is still in one piece
  • 09
    coturnixxx I saw someone park his bike on a sidewalk and then painstakingly hang his bike lock on one of the handlebars. Then he just walked away.
  • 10
    renegad3rogu3 I once, as a child, thought that one of those long lighters for candles was a curling iron. Proceeded to burn the out of my ear and hair.
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    BubbleTK I saw someone open a milk carton by cutting the top off with a knife
  • 12
    R9_280x First time this kid stayed away from home without parents and he thought an iron worked just by being a heavy metal thing to flatten clothes, didn't realise you could turn it on to heat it up or anything.
  • 13
    smileedude I remember sitting at a bus stop opposite a pair of escalators that were the wrong way to standard traffic. Every third person went up the down.
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    BlobfishAreCute Can opener. Twisted so hard they fell sideways off their chair.
  • 15
    FrankGoreStole MyBike. A time or dozen, back in my days of working on a forklift, after a long night, when I'd get into my car, I'd start it, and promptly put on the left blinker and rev the engine trying to back up. One day was particularly bad and it took me a few moments to put it together.
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    the2sday I've seen someone so incompetent with a can opener that every can they opened looked like a Pillsbury biscuit canister.
  • 17
    reddrambler Shovel. Saw someone put the foot up on it, ready to push down, then just fall over.
  • 18
    boyforsale Back in the 90s when I tried to show my mother how to use my home PC she picked up the mouse and pointed it at the screen like a remote control.
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    MadMichael Not-my-story: a lady- of-a-certain-age had her first computer and tried to operate the mouse on the floor, with her foot. Her only frame of reference was a sewing machine which was operated with a foot pedal.
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    Counterproductive Mud I know someone who was running late to work and his polyester polo shirt was still wet from the washer. What did he do? Put it in the dryer for five minutes? Use a hairdryer? No... He whacked it into the microwave and put it on for a couple of minutes. Nice and warm when he got it out... A trip to the emergency department and 2nd degree burns later... He was a changed man.
  • 21
    macceronicheese Saw someone trying to staple some pages together without a stapler. Just going at it with a single staple in hand.
  • 22
    [deleted] One guy at a breakfast buffet got to the Bacon tray. He took a pair of tongs and held them backwards, as in the part with which you are supposed to grab bacon, in his hand, pinched it closed so only a slit was left in between the two rods, trying to slide the bacon in between. I had to help him after watching this for 2 minutes. He was a grown man.
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    MR_DoubleT I wouldn't necessarily call this a fail but more of a success. Went to the beach with family and my cousin was on watermelon duty. So she starts cutting the watermelons and says "man it is so hard to cut this". I turn around and she's using the wrong side of the knife but she had already cut the watermelon in like 4 pieces. She is known as not being the brightest person out there but still surprised at her super human strength.
  • 24
    [deleted] An egg. I took a cake decorating class. In 12 weeks, this woman never figured out how to crack a raw egg. Every single time, she crushed it. No matter what advice she got or how many times she was shown.
  • 25
    HalfManHalfCyborg. In high school we had to do cooking classes. A guy in my group tried to peel a boiled egg, and ended up with the shell and all of the white part of the egg in the trash, and presented the spherical hard boiled yolk on the plate at the finished product.
  • 26
    NotVerySmarts When I was a kid, we would laugh when my mom would try to play Mario Bros on Nintendo and she would try to jump lifting up the controller. Now I try to play Nintendo Wii with my son, and he laughs because I forget to jump by raising up the controller.
  • 27
    Fernoc One of my roommates once failed to make the Kraft instant mac and cheese bowls...twice... The first time he didn't take the lid off and just YOLO'd the whole thing into the microwave. On the second attempt he put in nowhere near enough water (there's a line on the inside showing you where to fill it up to) and so he got a second helping of burnt pasta. And I got a microwave that smelled like burnt pasta for a week.
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    He has a bachelors in engineering, a bachelors in applied mathematics and a masters in applied mathematics. And he couldn't make easy mac designed for 12 year olds.
  • 29
    ▸ [deleted] My fiancee can't use a a toaster. It's either lightly toasted or satan. There is no in between. I've shown her numerous times. Same result.
  • 30
    IGETPAIDFORTHAT. Sometimes when I'm in a hurry I'll start pulling my car door before I reach the handle and it sends me into a backwards stumble. Gotta look around to see if anyone was watching at those moments.
  • 31
    [deleted] Not so much hilarious, but a great example of humans using logic without understanding the true meaning. It was in Portugal, in Lisbon at a better than decent hotel. There was a couple in front of the elevator looking up at the floor indicator in a way that we presumed this was a new thing for them. We were on the ground floor.
  • 32
    The male of the other party saw the elevator was above us and pushed the down button to bring it to him. The elevator came, they got on but we didn't. As the elevator left for the parking garage I pushed the up button. I still remember the look of mild confusion on their faces when we met again. It was flawless logic, just not how elevators work.
  • 33
    ▸ [deleted] Sometimes I'll start reaching for the button on my keys to unlock my front door.
  • 34
    [deleted] Back in primary school while waiting at something akin to reception (I don't remember exactly where this happened) I saw a kid about seven or eight years old, accompanied by a teacher, taking nibbles from an unpeeled banana. He was trying to play it off like he enjoyed the taste, going "mmm" and trying not to cringe. I think the teacher had to then point it out to him that it's meant to be peeled.
  • 35
    He was the kind of chavy kid that got in trouble a lot and the teacher was with him for some kind of supervisory help. I don't remember much about him other than whenever I saw him about school I'd think of him as that moron who pretends to like eating banana peels.
  • 36
    MeEvilBob Many moons ago while working at an electronics store, a woman came in furious because we sold her a useless phone. After talking her down to where she would explain the issue, we find out that she didn't want a cell service plan so she bought a cordless phone, never connected the base to the phone line, and thought she could just use the cordless receiver as a cell phone.
  • 37
    Then there was the guy that returned a microphone saying he was getting shocks from holding it. I open the box to find out that he cut off the plug that goes into the amplifier and put on a regular wall power plug. It turned out he didn't know that you need an amplifier and speakers, he thought that you just plug a microphone into any old outlet anywhere and suddenly you have a loud booming voice.
  • 38
    may_ask_questions. A soda machine. The kind where you press your cup against the lever to make soda come out. I was at my local burger joint waiting for my order when I saw a middle aged gentleman walk up to the soda machine with cup in hand. He placed his cup under the spout and pressed logo part on top. Nothing came out. He presses harder. No soda. Undeterred, he changes spouts to try a different soda. Maybe this one was out? Nope.
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    He comes back to the original spout and pressed the top portion so hard with his entire hand that somehow his cup/machine get tilted for long enough for a few drops of soda to come out. He takes his cup with a few drops of soda and leaves.
  • 40
    Komlz Saw someone slide a cheese grater to grate the cheese instead of just sliding the cheese. This was a big grater so it wasn't really practical to move the grater.
  • 41
    H redheadredemption 78 I'd have to say cinnamon. One fall day, I decided to make myself some hot cocoa. My husband at the time (now ex) saw me making some and decided he wanted to make some too. I decided I wanted to go all out. I added whipped cream, then sprinkled some sugar and cinnamon on top. It looked so good, I even put a cinnamon stick in it to make it look extra gourmet. All my husband saw was that I had cinnamon sprinkled on top...and there were
  • 42
    cinnamon sticks out on the counter. So I sit on the couch to enjoy my cocoa, and I hear "um...how do you do it?" And I turn around to see him holding a cinnamon stick and gently shaking it over the top of the whipped cream. I couldn't stop laughing.
  • 43
    yfunk3 I once had a roommate who offered to help me make a fridge pie. We had both just moved in and didn't have everything we needed yet, so I asked her to whip cream with a large fork, even showed her how to do it. I go to do something else for a few minutes, then turn to her to see if she's done whipping the cream yet.
  • 44
    She was just moving the fork slowly back and forth an inch or so in each direction. In a straight line. When I turned to her, she complained that it's not working, and that we really need an electric beater to whip cream. I giggled and said she has to do it really fast and larger strokes to incorporate the air and demonstrated again. She then threw the bowl and fork down in a huff and said, "Oh, I give up!" and stormed out of the kitchen. It was the first warning sign, really...
  • 45
    becausefrog My mother-in-law has struggled with a tea kettle as well as a pram. The kettle has a button to open the spout. Hold down the button, spout lid pops up and you can pour the boiling water into your cup. Somehow, she was trying to push the button from the side, and then turning the kettle over until nearly upside down to get it to pour (because the lid was not in fact opening using this method), causing very hot water to spit out all around but not actually into the cup. She did this se
  • 46
    her to put the kettle down and showed her how to press the button on the top instead of the side. I know they also make kettles with sliding buttons that you push from the side, but this is usually evident right away, or at least after the first failed attempt. Not for MIL - and who upends a full, very hot kettle anyway?
  • 47
    The pram vs the tree. Walking along pushing an empty pram (because no one in their right mind would let her push a pram with a baby in it!), she is confronted by a tree and its rather large roots. She proceeds to back up a step, and charge forward at speed, but still the roots resist her efforts. Cue the madwoman pulling the pram back and slamming it into the roots several times while bystanders look on in horror. Assuming there is a child within, one woman shouts and starts to run over to rescu
  • 48
    sending the pram flying over the roots and straight into the trunk of the tree. And that is why Grandma isn't allowed near small children.
  • 49
    Ventisoylatte My husband has "cooked" exactly 3 times in the decade of our marriage. Each was a disaster but the final straw was when he tried to make Ramen. We were at an airbnb that didn't have a kettle so I told him he'd have to boil the water in a pot. I notice that the water is boiling but he's just standing there. I asked what he was doing, the water is ready and he says "isn't it supposed to whistle?" The man was used to hearing a stovetop kettle whistling when water boiled and thought th
  • 50
    brickberry I have a friend who is, literally, a genius. This guy finished standard university-level math by his early teens and is now into stuff you need an advanced degree just to work with. Brain the size of a planet. ...and then there was the time he called me in a panic because he'd locked himself inside a house. He couldn't find the key, you see. It was so funny I was tempted to leave him there.
  • 51
    eta 'but some houses have locking deadbolts???!!!!!!': this one didn't, which is why it's a funny story. It wouldn't be interesting at all if he was actually locked inside. Give me some credit here.
  • 52
    snivsniv_22 I work in a restaurant and I remember dropping a plate of food to my table as well as leaving them a pepper mill per their request. As I'm standing at the bar casually surveying the dining room, I see the guy at my table attempt to navigate grinding pepper onto his plate...unsuccessfully. He's turned it upside down and is shaking it vigorously, all while inspecting his progress. Eventually he sets it down, seemingly satisfied with his results I suppose. Then, his table mate picks it
  • 53
    TheOnlyWayIs Epee My cat tried to jump on to a kitchen stool. He didn't see that there was a tray placed on top and for a brief moment he and it flew, magic carpet style!
  • 54
    engineerhear Saw a woman trying to use a kitchen broom to sweep 3 feet of snow from her car, she was sweeping it right in front of her car. Best part was her dumb boyfriend using the broom tray to remove snow from the top of the car and tossing it right where she was sweeping from. This went on for about 30 minutes, they went back inside.
  • 55
    engineerhear Saw a woman trying to use a kitchen broom to sweep 3 feet of snow from her car, she was sweeping it right in front of her car. Best part was her dumb boyfriend using the broom tray to remove snow from the top of the car and tossing it right where she was sweeping from. This went on for about 30 minutes, they went back inside.
  • 56
    N64GC My roommate doesnt get that you have to plug the toaster in first.
  • 57
    giggidygoo2 My flatmate wanted to use my butter once. I keep it refrigerated, they do not. They couldn't work out how to spread it, they kept hitting the bread with it, I could barely keep a straight face.
  • 58
    CherManMao Gas station pumps. People always pull their cars up on the wrong side. Not just once but repeatedly. It's a fascinating and quite public exposition of a lack of spacial awareness.

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